Sharon Idahosa

Intro

[00:01:02] Sharon Idahosa: Hello, beautiful ladies. Welcome to the Herstory Podcast, where we unveil women’s narratives from all walks of life. My name is Sharon Idahosa and I am your host. So, I’m excited to let you know that we have just started our series on women in leadership, where we will hear firsthand from women who are doing amazingly well in the different fields, and I’m really excited to begin this episode with a phenomenal woman who is fondly called Coach BMO.

[00:01:32] Sharon Idahosa: Because of our dedication to helping women to achieve excellence in all areas of their lives. Are you ready? Join me in welcoming Abolanle Matel-Okoh, like I said, coach BMO, as she is fondly called, a pastor, an executive coach, an auto, and of course, a podcaster. Just like myself. Well, thank you so much for joining the Her Story podcast.

[00:01:56] Sharon Idahosa: I’m really excited to have you here. How are you doing today?

[00:01:59] Coach BMO: I [00:02:00] am doing great. Thank you, Sharon, for having me. Um, I’m absolutely, absolutely thrilled to be here on the Her Story podcast. And I really just want to commend on Landy Boy to Inspire, encourage, and motivate. Be their very best. Yes, I’m, I’m here and I’m excited.

[00:02:20] Sharon Idahosa: Thank you so much. I mean, really, I had always wanted to do something around, um, connecting with women because majorly my focus has always been in the agricultural sector. So I also host, um, an agriculture podcast, right? Um, agricultural podcast. So I’m just, Uh, more because in the agriculture sector, but I said, I really have to do something around this because sometimes it looks like even, um, in my business, I still tend to give priority to women.

[00:02:53] Sharon Idahosa: So my husband says, um, I’m always prioritizing women. I said, okay, well, that’s really, [00:03:00] there’s nothing wrong with that. So just allow me to, to do my own thing and let’s, let’s, let’s put agriculture out of the way. So I’m really excited, honestly. To be in this.

[00:03:11] Coach BMO: And I, I, I think, I don’t think there’s, with that, you know, I, I, as an ex I also prioritize women, um, coaching.

[00:03:18] Coach BMO: ’cause I do realize this, um, narrating women, men, it’s a mess. I say it every, I have beneficiary, women, every, you know, I feel like what I, to pay women in their.

[00:03:29] Sharon Idahosa: Yes. And I really, I really love what you’re doing, and hopefully we can do something more, more than this. Um, I, I, I’m, I’m sure that this is just the very first step, so I’m really excited to have this opportunity today and, um, I look forward to the future, right.

[00:03:46] Sharon Idahosa: I mean, something amazing that we could do together at the end of the day. So, but really, thank you so much for joining. All right. I’m so happy to. Thank you. So, as we dive into today’s topic, being leadership that inspires, I will be taking it from. The [00:04:00] different angles with the first being breaking barriers.

[00:04:03] Sharon Idahosa: So let’s talk about your personal journey. What has been your journey in leadership? Can you, um, share a time where you encountered challenges due to your gender?

[00:04:14] Coach BMO: Absolutely. So I think about it’s been almost 10 years now that I had the seat board bank, which I’m still on, um, that was really where I developed a desire structure that I, cause I realized off the bat that when I got Underrepresented women, the ratio of men to see that, um, men have this tendency of, you know, I found out that I would have to twice, you know, prove yourself.

[00:04:39] Coach BMO: And, um, people would question your capabilities as a woman. And, um, even though it wasn’t always sometimes very subtle, but I, I’ve been the kind that I am willing, backing down on myself and also just be bored Ownership in, I felt that there was also that, you know, thought that’s here because so I really felt [00:05:00] themselves, but so it only made me more, prove myself like an over time expertise.

[00:05:05] Coach BMO: And for every woman we find us at the end of the, even in the family, even in family, we always have this, but the boys are different from that. Uh, this, I don’t know if you’re cultural people or. There has to be definitely paid to as really challenging, but I’m one that’s passionate about them and believing that every child actually an excellent.

[00:05:23] Coach BMO: Oh,

[00:05:23] Sharon Idahosa: well, thank you

[00:05:24] Coach BMO: so

[00:05:25] Sharon Idahosa: much for sharing your own experience. Um, and I really understand, um, where you’re coming from. I mean, I know that you’re way ahead of your course, right? But somehow I have actually still faced something like that myself. I mean, I really hate hearing the word prove yourself. I don’t know.

[00:05:45] Sharon Idahosa: Uh, I really hate this. Prove

[00:05:47] Coach BMO: yourself. Prove your worth. Yeah,

[00:05:49] Sharon Idahosa: absolutely. It not told me that, and I said, I mean, I was trying to contribute to a Maxine and at some point I had, uh, a minor surgery and I had to slow [00:06:00] down the pace and I even tried to still submit. I mean, the article, even, even if it was even for free, you told me that to prove my words.

[00:06:14] Sharon Idahosa: And I was like, Oh no, I don’t, I don’t prove my words to any man. I’m sorry. I mean, I know what I am doing, but don’t tell me to prove my words. If I want to do it, I will do it. So I’m not proving myself to you. I mean, I really don’t think it’s. It’s, it’s, it’s ideal for, for us to be hearing such things. I mean, we don’t have to do

[00:06:35] Coach BMO: the reality of the world we live in.

[00:06:37] Coach BMO: It’s not ideal, but that’s the reality. You know, this notion that men and women, it’s trading at times. It can be the, the farthest thing from the truth, because I have been in times where I’ve met women absolutely excel way among, but like still have.

[00:06:54] Sharon Idahosa: And you know what’s funny? Uh, it’s not like we want to compete with the men because I believe that [00:07:00] we are queens.

[00:07:01] Sharon Idahosa: We have our own way of doing things. I mean, we are the ones that basically supports the men to make them to be who they should be. So we are not trying to, um, to compete with the men. So I don’t see why we should, there should still be this, Um, stereotype, should I put it that way? Yeah, it is a stereotype, yeah.

[00:07:23] Sharon Idahosa: I really don’t think that there should still be something like that. But anyway, I would just like to know how you were able to navigate through that situation. I mean, considering that. This was a family business, right? But then again, you had to step in. And of course, it

[00:07:40] Coach BMO: wasn’t a family business. It was a bank, but I got on board because I’m going to acquire some shares on the board on the, in the bank, which entire, um, seats the board.

[00:07:50] Coach BMO: Um, and, and what I, I had to do myself, you know, make people realize this person is bored because board, um, feel bad here made my vote [00:08:00] known when I’ve known shrink back. I did not shrink back even when I felt like. Make you feel like you’re back instantly. And I also, you know, cause I say that women can’t just demand others.

[00:08:12] Coach BMO: We also rise qualified. We must sell to be at the top of our so that it’s not just out or why they, they, we must be able to prove our worth so that at the end of the say that, you know what I deserve to as much as.

[00:08:25] Sharon Idahosa: Yes, I, I totally agree with that. I remember when I was starting out my. My business and I wanted to, um, collaborate with the Ministry of Agriculture and told me, uh, we don’t collaborate with smog, we do so with the legalization, like the air flow and the rest.

[00:08:44] Sharon Idahosa: And I was like, oh my god, I wouldn’t, oh my god. I wouldn’t want to be seen as, um, this person that had to, um, cancel a dream because somebody told me this. So I told myself I was going to [00:09:00] work hard and be that person that they would want to partner with. And down low, I started deliberately working on my personal brand and connecting with those organizations that they wanted to connect with so that I can have that voice.

[00:09:16] Sharon Idahosa: So sometimes it’s about working hard, playing your own role, just so that it’s On the table with kings and queens. I mean, like you said, we definitely have a role to play if we want to be seen as who we want to be seen, right? I mean, we need to really play our role. So it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s more than just women supporting women and what we are saying, but I mean, if you have that, um, If you have that, that leadership, that’s that’s positioning.

[00:09:51] Sharon Idahosa: I mean, I feel like everything can just easily work out for you. I think that we have a major role to play. Don’t just sit down and wait for opportunities. [00:10:00] I mean, Let’s grab the opportunities because I mean, we are women. I feel that if we want to do anything We have the capacity to do it. We have the capability.

[00:10:08] Sharon Idahosa: Absolutely

[00:10:09] Coach BMO: Yeah, and I believe

[00:10:11] Sharon Idahosa: so

[00:10:11] Coach BMO: I absolutely believe so, you know, we are gifted, you know, there’s There’s just a grace. I’m a pastor, so I always, woman is find God’s created. I was like, Oh, I need to dead woman. And that’s why I feel like as women, we are the ability to task, you know, it is just innate and inside of ability to be able to tap have been created too.

[00:10:33] Sharon Idahosa: Yes. So it just depends on, I mean, thank God that you’re doing something in this, um, area. I mean, lots of women need to understand this. They need to know that they have a role to play as well. So I think that, um, awareness is something that can really help them to know that they deserve to be in leadership position and for them to get to that point.

[00:10:53] Sharon Idahosa: They also have a role to play work on themselves. Don’t just wait for. For opportunity, you have to be [00:11:00] prepared for such a, you cannot be praying for blessings and blessings, and then you can’t handle it when it comes. So preparation,

[00:11:07] Coach BMO: I always say something prepared, being prepared plus opportunities, because if you are not prepared and get, and so it is so important to walk through the, because there will be doors.

[00:11:18] Coach BMO: There’ll be, it is the level of repair and determine whether or not you’re able to.

[00:11:22] Sharon Idahosa: Thank you so much for sharing. So my next point would be on navigating bias. So how do you handle gender bias? I mean, whether it’s true or overt, I mean, you mentioned it already in the workplace. The

[00:11:35] Coach BMO: truth is that gender bias is real.

[00:11:37] Coach BMO: It’s so very real and it’s all about our As an executive coach, I always step to solving cause what are we, and you know, gender bias are subtle, it can be, but once you rep, must deal with, cause there are people that set your power, they will put you in where they, because it will make you so on a woman.

[00:11:54] Coach BMO: But if you are aware of what is going, like able spawned, you know, I say that response, that means [00:12:00] you don’t let that, you don’t let, or you just take it, or stalking, stalking constantly. And I said to her, I said the best, the best rep, it becomes a, you say, you know, you know, So it’s all about making sure that your ability, um, by honing skills, selling, being able, you’re at the table like before.

[00:12:16] Coach BMO: Um, because you know, there was that, why is it, um, in the U S they say gender inclusion, but you know, at the end of the day, it really should be about we. Knowing that we feel it, I’ve been given a fair chance, you know, so, uh, but I think we’re making progress, we’re making things that more may drop here really go.

[00:12:34] Coach BMO: So, for the other day, our pilot was a woman, you know, clapping when I, when she came on. It’s very rare to see that, so. Women are strive, remember that leave European airlines flew a pilot. So the, we are making proof it still worked. I think as women show the ability a lot of now where there used to be no chairman, but now so many of women are rising, proving that just as good.

[00:12:57] Coach BMO: Exactly. It’s, it’s,

[00:12:57] Sharon Idahosa: it’s, I think it’s, it’s about [00:13:00] us, not just, I mean, we have to write that point to let people know that. Yes, you can actually do this. Not just the, um, continuous awareness for gender inclusion, but are we ready? That’s, that’s a question that we should always ask ourselves. If, if the opportunities are there.

[00:13:18] Sharon Idahosa: Are we ready to take them? So it’s about us working to, to build ourselves to be able to handle such positions. Just like you said, I was in, I was also in a flight where the pilot was a woman and I actually felt so good, right? And I, I, such a thrill, such a thrill, and there is this difference that I, that I felt between, um, The man and the woman, because for my, my going, it was a woman coming back was a man, but I just felt the way the woman landed.

[00:13:54] Sharon Idahosa: And I said, yes, she’s always careful.

[00:13:58] Coach BMO: Yes. You know, because yeah. And that’s what [00:14:00] I felt about our life. It was such a smooth flight. And I just, we just have this instinct, you know, women have strong instincts that when we tap, we excel in anything. I tell people that be, be wary of a woman who set her mind on something because she will get it done.

[00:14:22] Sharon Idahosa: I had to differentiate. I said, no, this is a man. The way the man landed, I said, no, this must be a man. The woman just landed so peacefully, like she was. Petting a child. I said, good. This is, this is how we, how we operate. So, so we really need more women to, to, you know, really take up leadership role because it’s just going to make the world a better place.

[00:14:44] Sharon Idahosa: I know that. I know that for sure. But do you have any advice you’d like to share to women? More like to prepare them? Oh, I think you shared something, but maybe you can still just add a little bit.

[00:14:56] Coach BMO: You, it’s the book. You know, so when I, I, I, I run a, [00:15:00] like, Oh, why do you are in standing? You are honing your skill.

[00:15:03] Coach BMO: Um, so development never is an investment. Yesterday’s excellent. And so the skills that you, they have become in effect today. So it’s about again. Recognize it better. I’m someone that directionist, I just, I do. And so, you know, that is do not rest. ’cause at times we’re like, oh, I’ve arrived. I don’t need, but it’s not about resting on yours, it’s about continuing to get better.

[00:15:26] Coach BMO: That gets better to giving yourself a higher target, higher goal. You know? So that’s really what, because that is what make sure you stake, make sure that would, what will make sure that you remain competitive according, rather than, you know, so that’s, that would be.

[00:15:41] Sharon Idahosa: Thank you so much for sharing that. I think that’s also that also applies in our businesses as well.

[00:15:47] Sharon Idahosa: So if you run a business as a woman, I mean, it is very important that you continuously, um, modify and try to make some changes as, as, as the trends, you continue to see some trends, you try [00:16:00] to see how to. To put that together. It’s just the same way that people complain that technology is taking their jobs And I mean I keep saying technology cannot take your job if you don’t walk up to that page to you know How you can utilize the good thing that technology has brought then that’s where you’re failed you failed So we have to continuously Walk and improve ourselves.

[00:16:22] Sharon Idahosa: I mean, growth is something that is consistent. You don’t sleep on it. You don’t, you don’t rest. You continue to learn. So thank you so much for sharing that. And I really hope that a lot of women out there will grab this advice and what you have to offer. So let’s talk about your leadership style. How do you define your leadership style?

[00:16:43] Sharon Idahosa: In what way?

[00:16:45] Coach BMO: So my, my, my leadership style, um, so I’m, you know, I, I, I teach about leaders and I talk about traditional leaders. And for me, my leadership style is, you know, inspiring, inspiring, polite, means empathy. It’s really about, I, I feel like if [00:17:00] someone I’m leading into what I’m, you know, a lot of leaders are very supportive.

[00:17:03] Coach BMO: Skeptical or people to be as good as they might even be, but, you know, one of the best quality and that leadership is, you know, fulfill their potential. So for me, it’s a berating strategy for side it’s, uh, you know, empowering my team to a point where they’re able to work. It’s about, um, empowering others to bring their best table.

[00:17:23] Coach BMO: And it’s also about creating a thrive. Cause the truth is that no matter how good a person, if they’re in environment and they find themselves in environment growth, they’re And, um, creativity and the ability to express themselves. It’s only a matter of time. So it’s really about coaching and helping to really be the best because, um, a team is only as strong as the weakest.

[00:17:44] Coach BMO: So you have to stand, lead, up, be tamed, empowering your team, educating them, helping them to grow so that they can really deliver the best level.

[00:17:53] Sharon Idahosa: Thank you so much for sharing. So if you can actually advise a young woman today. What would that be? [00:18:00] What advice would that be? I mean, oh, wow.

[00:18:03] Coach BMO: Yes. So my advice, know your role, know yourself, and be relentless.

[00:18:09] Coach BMO: Understand that leadership is fitting into pre definition, but about bringing yourself. I think a lot of people, they, they have role models, good, and they want to, at the same time, you want to use your authentic, because your authentic self is best. Um, you know, you, you’re, I tell people that you’re, you’re original is better than any other, the best of pretending.

[00:18:32] Coach BMO: So be your unique self, understand the unique, you know, what the things that you think defy you and really they were distinguished. So don’t be afraid to take up because at the end of it, if you do the, when you know yourself, you will really are the everything.

[00:18:47] Sharon Idahosa: Thank you. I think that’s, that’s like a very amazing advice.

[00:18:51] Sharon Idahosa: You know, some years back, I actually felt like something was, was not right because I didn’t have someone I was looking up to. I mean, someone I [00:19:00] wanted to be like, it was like, I was constantly working to be a better version of myself, to have like an identity where. People would definitely look up to me because yes, I mean, I want to see how to help young people like myself, women to, you know, be a better version of themselves.

[00:19:20] Sharon Idahosa: And I just felt like something was wrong with me for not really having a role model that I was looking up to, but then again, that was when I realized that I wanted to, I was working my own path, right? So I have an identity. I have, I have, I have something to show, to share to the world that. I, I shouldn’t, I shouldn’t, um, bring in someone else’s personality into it because this is me.

[00:19:42] Sharon Idahosa: This is, I have my own identity.

[00:19:43] Coach BMO: Authentic. I see a lot of you. It’s so it. Hello.

[00:19:47] Sharon Idahosa: Hi. Thank you so much for sharing that. I really enjoyed this episode. So then, um, hopefully we can have you again, so you go with us and I’m [00:20:00] sure you’ll love that. All right. Fantastic. All right. Thank you for having me. It is a pleasure.

[00:20:05] Sharon Idahosa: So guys, we have come to the end of today’s episode. I really hope that you learn from this and I hope that you share this with amazing women out there. who are very keen to build their leadership skills and become who they are meant to be. So for more information, please do all to visit Please share your website address and, um, your Instagram page so that, um, more young people can visit and see ways to tap into what you have in store for, for them.

[00:20:35] Sharon Idahosa: Okay. So my

[00:20:36] Coach BMO: Instagram is localteen. com. I

[00:20:38] Sharon Idahosa: look forward to the future. Thank you so much. I’ll definitely check it out. Of course, I’ve been secretly checking you out. so much. Thank you so much for joining. Please do enjoy the rest of your day.

[00:20:52] Coach BMO: All right. Okay. All right. Bye bye. God bless. Thank

[00:20:55] Sharon Idahosa: you. Bye.